| Thursday, August 11, 2005 |
| Crochety Oil Guy vs. The Designer Pantsuit |
 If Bob Woodward is right, it will be Hillary v. Cheney in 2008. Not sure I'm buying Cheney running for president (he will have already led the country for eight years, so there would be no novelty in it, though the lure of bringing his particular brand of unadulterated evil to center stage might be just too much for the old guy to resist...) but just for fun, let's say he does run:
The primary would be a bloodbath: McCain swift boated with claims he joined the Viet Cong and ritually married one -- maybe two -- of their women during his "stay" in the Hanoi Hilton, Rudy's scandal bag busted wide open (as his gay friends leak all sorts of juicy tidbits to the press in retaliation for his sudden refusal to return their phonecalls), Bill Frist desperately clawing at Focus on the Family's door Sunday after justice Sunday, begging for forgiveness and just five minutes onstage, George Allen unable to wipe that goofy smile off his face and ultimately creeping out both the media and the electorate, and Rick Santorum's people offering bribes to get him back on "The Daily Show." All while Karl Rove releases the FBI files of all of the above to Fox News and Dick Cheney's other henchmen reprogram the box on Dubya's back so that he's only able to speak when his "subordinate" presses a certain button on a well-guarded remote control ...
Wow. That ought to make the Hillary vs. Edwards vs. Kerry primary seem like an episode of the Partidge Family. I wonder where they'll hold the nominating convention ... Can I get a "Guantanamo Bay"...? |
posted by JReid @ 11:41 AM   |
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