Palin … Bachman … Jolie?
Hateration? Angelina Jolie and President Barack Obama
She’s a famous, beautiful, and unrepentant homewrecker who once slobbed down her own brother, and wore her former husband’s blood in a vial around her neck. Though unmarried, lives with somebody else’s former husband with whom she has borne multiple out-of-wedlock children, to go with the eleventy-five Third World trinkets she has adopted from around the world … Jerry Falwell, before his untimely demise, practically called her a whore. But could Angelina Jolie be the next Sarah Palin, and thus, the right wing’s latest wet dream? Allahpundit is panting at the possibility. And somebody should sedate Bill Kristol and that “little starburst” guy Rich Lowry after this rumor revelation from US Weekly:
Barack Obama does not have Angelina Jolie’s seal of approval.
“She hates him,” a source close to the U.N. goodwill ambassador, 34, tells the new issue of Us Weekly (on newsstands now).
“She’s into education and rehabilitation and thinks Obama is all about welfare and handouts. She thinks Obama is really a socialist in disguise,” adds the source.
But don’t expect to see the Salt actress rally against Democrats on Fox News like her staunch Republican father, Jon Voight.
“Angie isn’t Republican, but she thinks Obama is all smoke and mirrors,” the source says.
According to the tabloid, it’s something she and The Pitt fight about, which beats fighting about why she’s trying to become the next Octomom. As evidence for Jolie’s supposed Obama hatred, Allahpundit points out that Jolie was absent on the campaign trail last year, while The Pitt was an openly declared Obamaphile (though she did offer some non-hateful words for the then candidate, she never did declare who she was for — not that anybody exactly cared, but there you go.) And Pitt rode solo on his trek to Washington, complete with a visit to the White House this year. Meanwhile, Jolie’s lineage includes one insane, right wing nut of a father, D-list actor John Voigt, who made his most recent starring appearance … at a Michelle Bachman crazy people rally, which should really up his bookings in Tinsletown. All snark aside, I think Angelina would fit in nicely on the other side. She’s probably going to look like Bachman in another 15 years anyway, and based on her public morality alone, she’s a one-woman torch which would blaze through the right’s “family values” malarky like a runaway brush fire. On that score, she’s even better than Carrie Prejean! So righties: please keep wetting the bed for Ms. Jolie. You don’t even have to trade us anyone in return. Really.
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