My Thanksgiving Herald column: a little chat with my American family

It’s Thanksgiving, which means many of us will spend the day watching football, eating too much and pretending not to be annoyed by our relatives.
There will, of course, be that family member who shows up, has a few too many and tells the whole family what they really think.

Well, consider this column that over-sauced relative, because there are a few things I’d like the relations to hear.

More of my column in today’s Miami Herald:

Sister Sarah: Just because your daughter beat Brandy on Dancing With the Stars doesn’t mean you should be president. I know, I know, the media is obsessed by people with big masses of hair, high, nasally voices and Twitter accounts, but we’re talking about having access to the button.

How ironic if the party that ran against Barack Obama’s supposedly empty celebrity in 2008 put a reality-show star and relentless image peddler who was picked as John McCain’s running mate purely as a marketing gimmick, at the top of the ticket?

The overseas relatives, and Republicans who realize it could actually happen, are rightfully horrified. They should take it up with Uncle Rupert. Or that guy from TLC. (We’re not quite sure who he came with.)

Grandpa John McCain: Sir, the fact that Ms. Palin will be the headline of your legacy is a sad holiday card indeed.

To the tea party cousins: The jobs the GOP plans to clear the way to outsource next year are yours. The tax cuts will belong to Glenn Beck and their Wall Street friends. Sorry to be the one to break it you.

And for those in the family who argued a few Thanksgivings back that it was OK for the Bush administration to wiretap our phone calls, read our mail, view our library check-outs, spirit U.S. citizens off to indefinite detention and torture people, we really don’t want to hear your TSA body-scan outrage stories from the flight to Grandma’s. …

Read the rest of the column here. Happy Thanksgiving to all (even the Republicans.)

This entry was posted in Holidays, Opinion, Politics, Thanksgiving and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to My Thanksgiving Herald column: a little chat with my American family

  1. Pingback: Happy Thanksgiving « Beach Peanuts

  2. Dewey says:

    Stop blaming FoxNews, you sauced up liberal bitch.

  3. Flo says:

    Who is the sauced up one, Dewey?? Or are you just unable to read all the time? Jerk.

  4. JReid says:

    Stay classy, Dewey. Hell of a debating style you’ve got there!

  5. Richard says:

    I think Dewey meant “nice progressive lady.”
    Meanwhile his friends at Fox are posting fake Onion stories as “news.”

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