The Politico writer wasn't listening. ... too busy gawking at all the celebrities... yeah, I understand. Eight years of nothing but Kelsey Grammer, an aging Bo Derek and Dennis "not even kind of funny" Miller had to be one hell of a bummer...
Newsbusters whinges that Sykes only attacked conservatives and white people... waaaaa... but they helpfully transcribe all of Wanda's best zingers, which I'll be helpful in providing below:
* I know Governor Palin, she's not here tonight. She pulled out at the last minute. You know, somebody should tell her that's not really how you practice abstinence. * And I have to say to the First Lady, kudos to you for unveiling the bust of the Sojourner of Truth in the White House. That's, yes. And, but, could you do me a favor and please make sure it's nailed down real well since, 'cause you know when the next white guy comes in they gonna move it to the kitchen. * Rush Limbaugh, one of your big critics, boy, Rush Limbaugh said he hopes this administration fails. So, you're saying "I hope America fails," it's like, I don't care about people losing their homes, or their jobs, our soldiers in Iraq. He just wants the country to fail. To me, that's treason. He's not saying anything differently than what Osama bin Laden is saying. You know, you might want to look into this, Sir, because I think maybe Rush Limbaugh was the 20th hijacker, but he was just so strung out on oxycontin he missed his flight. * Rush Limbaugh, I hope the country fails, I hope his kidneys fail, how 'bout that? Needs a little waterboarding, that's what he needs. * Sean Hannity, Sean Hannity said he's going to get waterboarded for charity, for our armed forces. He hasn't done it yet, I see. You know, talking about how he can take a waterboarding. Please. Okay, he can take a waterboarding by someone you know and trust, but let somebody from Pakistan waterboard, or Keith Olbermann. Let Keith Olbermann waterboard him. He can't take a waterboarding. I can break Sean Hannity just by giving him a middle seat in coach. * Dick Cheney, oh my God, he's a scary man, scares me to death. I tell my kids, I says, "Look, if two cars pull up, and one has a stranger, and the other car has Dick Cheney, you get in the car with the stranger." * And finally, Sir, they even gave you grief about the dog, about Bo. You know, the animal rights people on you, "Why didn't he get a rescue dog? Why didn't he get a rescue dog?" Look, the man has to rescue a country that's been abused by its previous owner. Let him have a fresh start with a dog.
God, those never get old... Not to be outdone, here are Obama's best lines:
"I strongly believe my next 100 days will be so successful I will finish them in 72 days," Obama said. "And on the 73rd day I will rest."
"Michael Steele is in the house tonight – or as he would say, ‘in the heezee,’ he said, pausing for laughter before adding, "Whas’ up?" [Needless to say, the self-obsessed Steele lapped up the attention.]'
“That brings me to another thing that’s changed – my relationship with Hillary. We may have been rivals during the campaign, but these days we couldn’t be closer. In fact, the second she got back from Mexico she greeted me with a big hug and a kiss – told me I really oughta get down there myself.
"In the next hundred days, our bipartisan outreach will be so successful that even John Boehner will consider becoming a Democrat. After all, we have a lot in common. He is a person of color. Although not a color that appears in the natural world. …
DL Hughley's new CNN show isn't funny ... and that's just half the problem
See, this is what happens when the suits try to figure out what "the young folks" are into -- you know, like when your parents try to dress like you...?
DL Hughley got a show on CNN and Roland Martin didn't. Go figure. And not surprisingly, white critics love it, black critics don't. Why? One word: buffoonery. It's the last thing black people want to see at a time when we are about to elect our first black president. It's "Amos and Andy" at a time when we want "Hardball":
The fight to be taken seriously -- not just cast in slapstick crap comedies or as crack addicts, is as real as rain for black actors; just as the fight to make and release music that isn't about guns, money and hoes is real for black musicians (not to mention those of us trying to convince program directors that black people can do talk radio for non-black audiences...) The corporate execs still don't get it -- maybe because ... wait for it ... there's not enough diversity up there.
CNN, over the weekend debuted "DL Hughley: Breaks The News", the only African American hosted cable news program. Hughley, reverted back to his early BET "Comic View"days, lacking the intellectual clarity he often displays on Bill Maher or even recent CNN appearances. DL's material was immensely stereo typical, but calculated programming that continues to stifle mainstream media perceptions. CNN's attempt of a Flava Flav style of African American entertainment is an alarming step backward for a respected news organization.
It's easy to point the not funny finger at DL Hughley but the real story is who's behind the camera. While this election cycle has shown a diverse collection of analyst and pundits, media ownership and equity of power in television and radio are far from equitable.
While people of color make up 33% of the American population, less than 7% are owners and even fewer are in decision making positions.Yes, there are plenty of Black anchors and reporters on cable and network news but the content they report continually falls short. Perception has replaced reality, millions of Americans are yearning for more, while receiving less.
When George Carlin died, he was heralded by the media as the wryest social commentator of his generation. Well, Bernie Mac was the George Carlin of Black America. Actually, he needed no such derivation. He was the funniest comedian, black or white, in my opinion, to come along in 20 years. May God rest his soul.
Born Bernard Jeffrey McCullough on Oct. 5, 1957, in Chicago, Mac grew up on the city's South Side. His publicist said he died Saturday from complications of pneumonia. He had suffered from sarcoidosis, an inflammatory lung disease that produces tiny lumps of cells in the body's organs, but had said the condition went into remission in 2005. He recently was hospitalized and treated for pneumonia, which his publicist said was not related to the disease.
Velin Stewart, 39, said Mac's success was a "point of civic pride" for Chicagoans, and not just because of his celebrity.
"I was just in shock to wake up and hear that Bernie Mac was dead," Stewart said. "He made it big, but it didn't seem to go to his head. He could have lived anywhere in the world. But he stayed close to where he came from."
That sense of approachability, of humility, is what led Gary Crawford to introduce himself in 2005 to the comedian at a Chicago White Sox game. Crawford, 51, manages a Chicago-based Web site that benefits surviving Negro League baseball players. In 2004, Mac starred in "Mr. 3000," a movie about an aging baseball player who returns to the game to collect his 3,000th hit.
Crawford thought the two might share a commonality.
"I've seen a lot of celebrities at baseball games and Bernie wasn't like that, meaning he didn't have an entourage," Crawford said. "We talked for several minutes, baseball mostly. He was excited the White Sox seemed to be poised for a pennant run. All in all, just a very down-to-earth regular guy."
"Mr. 3000" wasn't his only great film role. He was hilarious in "Life," and even made the insufferable "Oceans 11" series palatable. Mac's self-titled TV show was great, especially in the first season, and he was by far the highlight of "The Original Kings of Comedy." (Grab his complete filmography here.)
Dying at 50 is an incredible truncation of a life well lived. Mac really did take in his sister's children after she became strung out on drugs. He plugged away for 30 years to become a success in comedy, television and movies, and he stayed funny to the end. Unfortunately, dying young is becoming more and more common, and it's even more so among African Americans (Gerald Levert, Luther Vandross, Ed Bradley and others went in their 50s and 60s too, recently.)
Well, Bernie, here's to a great ride. You entertained the hell out of us, and you rode it till the wheels fell off.
In tribute, here's one of Mac's funniest bits:
And here's another (caution, the word "mothafucka" will be heard throughout.
Jason and I are watching the State of the Black Union conference (otherwise known as "Come to Tavis"...) No, Barack isn't there. (More on that another time...) And 75-year-old comedian Dick Gregory just delivered the line of the day:
"You know when I learned about the power of the Black woman? During the Kobe Bryant situation. He was accused of raping a white woman. And when he gave his wife that $4 million ring? I knew the Black woman was powerful. Because if I was accused of raping a white woman, and I gave my wife a $4 million ring...? She would have gone out and gotten two more white women ... because she would have had the good sense to know that wherever that $4 million ring came from, there's a necklace and a bracelet to go with it."